What's it about.
In honor of hell that we are induring in NYC right now, my mother and take 'THE RIDE'. As a NYC native I was excited, but who knew it didn't suck!
I have a complicated relationship with tourists.
I’ve been to the Statue of Liberty 4 times purely because I’ve had foreign family members who I have to take to see that oxidized piece of stone that has its own island. Can you tell I love it? Then there's the fact that I’ve had to go to the Wall Street bull about 8..9..or 10 times - I’ve lost count at this point - and had to not only watch but take pictures of my family touching the bulls' balls because they have some sort of screwed up idea that the thing's balls will give them luck? Who comes up with this sh*t...
I’ve had to explain that ground zero isn’t necessarily a place where you pull out your selfie stick and take a picture with the wall of names...always weird.
And by far the worst thing a tourist can do to me:
STAND IN THE MIDDLE OF THE STREET TO TAKE PICTURES!
I’m sorry for yelling, I am just really passionate about that one, because have you seen the size of the sidewalk? There's enough space for us to stand at a distance from each other... and I know the pictures are just for Facebook to know you came up NYC.
So, regardless of how cheesy and touristy this seems (you know, The Ride), it’s actually not as lame as I anticipated. Not that I’ve been on the sightseeing bus ever, but they tend to look pretty boring for a person that sees the city pretty much everyday. But this was different…both in the sense that not only are you seated sideways on the bus, but the people who are your « tour guides » seem more like comedians than guides. None of that headset and shitty microphone crap, but genuinely funny people.
Anything that has ever had to do with tourists on a bus I’d immediately veto but even for me, this was fun as hell. I went with my mum and we had a good time, and she’s lived here longer than me - mostly cause I am 21 and she’s been here since the 80’s. So this place was bit of a dump when she was here, so for her the boring facts about Grand Central Terminal and the Chrysler building were actually pretty interesting. Who wouda thunk?
Knowing it isn’t the typical red bus that drives you around traffic, this seems like the most appropriate version to give a basic tour of the city for anyone. The language barrier isn’t as obvious because it has the singing and dance acts to fall back on. The spontaneous weirdos who suddenly dance or sing for you through a bus window really shows you how weird we get here. I guess we are a spectacle for the outsiders...you’re welcome for the hot mess.
Been on it?
Tell us about your experience.
In the comments below.